A Response to “Straight Black Men Are the White People of Black People”

I agree with the post. I only ask as a black man raising my black daughter that we continue this dialogue and translate it to action.

“It very concisely and concretely…”

Lmao. Everything in that glorified opinionated think piece was picked apart hours after it dropped. Shit, he picked a part his own argument in the first paragraph ??‍♂️

My response I would love some feedback: hnic160@gmail.com

The article “Straight Black Men are the White People of the Black Community” and its companion piece “A Woman’s Response To ‘Straight Black Men Are The White People Of Black People” are predicated on a false premise, riddled with huge generalities, and contain factually false information. However, the articles have an extremely poignant message that can be deciphered from the wreckage. I want to start off with the great aspects of the article before I move on to my critique. I pray that you the reader will indulge me and not turn off your active listening based on your preference or dislike of the aforementioned articles. I read the articles and was forced into introspective thought based on the claims it presented. I consider myself a critical thinker and have no problem analyzing and critiquing aspects of our society that I hold near and dear to me. In layman’s terms: I know how to take my medicine. After much conversation with others (which is always a good way to get a broader perspective on a topic) I decided to write this article at the request of one of the Queens in my life Ms. Sandra Valminord.
Never forget that the black man and the black women in this country are two peopled deemed fugitives while attempting to escape an unjust prison. We are shackled at the ankles to each other and any attempt to hold back one will undoubtedly hold back the other. This analogy will become more poignant as we move on.
Aside from the solutions offered at the end of the companion piece by Dr. Kristian H, my greatest takeaway from the articles is that black men need better public relations. Let me explain first in practical examples before I clarify the overall thought in abstract. I would love to see a black man who just so happens to run across Tommy Sotomayor or Gilbert Arenas pull out their cell phone, give it to a bystander, and confront these individuals. On the behalf of black women and black men (remember the chained metaphor). Now I would be a fool if I wrote an article promoting violence, but perhaps a public apology is due from these two men (I’m no fool). The purpose of that is to send a very public statement that any talk of disrespect to black women will not be tolerated by the majority of black men. I omitted Kodak Black from this because of his age and subsequent willingness to see the error in his ways. However, a light boycott of his music would go well to send a message to any other entertainer who feels the right to say some dumb sh*t (pardon my French) about the Queens. I would like to see the video of those confrontations posted online, and a movement of black men on website forums openly (key word is openly) supporting the cause. I would like to see a “I love black women” challenge go viral. Black men creatively expressing their adoration for our Queens (I use “our” to reinforce our union not to imply any sense of ownership). I would like to see more black men stop arresting black women’s sexuality with the notions of a “thot” or a “ho”. If that girl slept with your boy on the first night then either she is a free and mature woman or your boy is a “thot” too, choose one. I would like to see straight black men march in support of the lgbtq community at pride events. I would like to see black men more PUBLICLY call out the effects of white supremacy on not just ourselves and our sons, but more so on our daughters and the Queens in and around our lives. There is a reason I am framing these acts in a very visible way. What the articles and subsequent conversations have made painfully clear is that black men are suffering from horrible public relations in terms of our relationship to black women. Now since the inception of this American experiment black men have suffered from negative public perceptions. However, this article seems to be the zenith of those perceptions in relation with our Queens.
Make no mistake about it, I agree that black men of righteous intent must do better in showing black women we are 100% committed to their love and protection. Now in the sentence you just read I purposefully specified a type of black man for a reason. I will label and define this black man of righteous intent partially through statistical averages. This black man is 28 years old makes about 24,000 a year is unmarried and has between 1-2 children. This black man sees toxic masculinity as not only a threat to the wellbeing of the Queens in and around his life, but also as a direct threat to his own well being. This black man understands the evils of oppression, and will not consciously partake in the oppression of any group such as black women or members of the lgbtq community. I define and label this black man of righteous intent partly with statistical averages because it is my assertion that this is the overwhelming majority of black men, up to the tune of let’s say 70% (my opinion based on my analysis of the data). This statistical expression allows my problems with the article to be expressed in numerical terms. If the reader would permit: the article assumes that 30% can speak for 100%, thus hiding the plight of the 70%, which in many ways is fighting against the 30%, but in a way that places proper blame on the creators of the 30% mentality, while simultaneously not demonizing the 30% in ways that separate the 100%, due to the fundamental principle of if not for the grace of god go I. Wheew! As you can properly assume, one of the largest problems with the article is the gross generalizations it makes. These generalizations are oftentimes the same ones used to create and uphold the system of white supremacy, which in chain creates and upholds the 30% mentality that caused the creation of the article. The cycle is complete.
Now an intelligent person reading this would say “well you could say that only a portion of white people are racist, but we address them all when talking about fixing white supremacy”. This is true but it highlights where the racism/sexism generalization comparison breaks apart. Let’s assume that 30% of white people are active supporters of white supremacy to evenly equate my assertion that 30% of black men are active supporters of toxic masculinity. This premise would then naturally beget the question: Why can we address all white people while addressing white supremacy but not all black men when addressing toxic masculinity? The answer lies in the notion of benefits. Not all white people are actively racist but the overwhelming majority of white people benefit from white supremacy (obviously some more than others). Now with toxic masculinity, not only does the 70% of black men who are not active participants not benefit, but they are actively punished for the actions of the 30% in debilitating ways. By the way, the 30% offenders receive no net benefit either. The criminal justice system is living proof of that. Toxic masculinity has been rightfully criminalized in our society. My Queen’s we are on the same side fighting the same enemy because toxic masculinity kills more black men than black women.
The only large scale benefit a black man has over a black women is that he has more muscle tissue, and that can be systematically negated by picking up the phone and dialing 911.
In hiring, black women are more likely to get a call back than black men. Black women are more likely to receive a loan than black men. Black men are more likely to get a longer prison sentence if a crime is committed. Black women are more likely to get into college and receive more scholarship money than black men. Black women have greater housing options than black men. Black women are perceived to have more parental rights than black men. Black women are recommended for advance placement classes at a higher rate than black men. The entire education system of standardized testing and classroom desk learning favors young girls learning style over young men. In every single quantifiable standard that we have in our society black women outperform black men. Now you are our better halves so I’m not surprised nor complaining, but I think you get the point. The only two arenas where I concede that black men have a distinct advantage over black women appear to be in the areas of sports and rap music. Now unfortunately for most black men, rappers and athletes become our representatives in this society. Rappers are way more visible and have the opportunity to be more outspoken than athletes so in many ways they dictate the perceived black male culture.
In the world we live in negativity is much more attractive to the eye than positivity (I suspect the author was well aware of this fact hence the article title). This is due to the fact that negativity is perceived to be outside the norm, and can be equated to freedom. So a music industry executive like Jimmy Iovine who has made millions by selling negativity, i.e. Eminem, 50 cent, Dr. Dre, Marilyn Manson, and Snoop Dogg, then goes and signs Chief Keef to a record deal and calls him the “voice of the generation”. All respect due to the brothers I just mentioned but the harsh reality is most of them grew up in areas rifled with toxic masculinity. So the dynamic of black men in America is that the 30% often represents the 70%. Now some may say, well the 70% listens to the toxic entertainment so they support it. Well according to that logic black women support the drink throwing attitude we see in reality television shows since they are the overwhelming majority of viewers. That is obviously not true in regards to both black men and women. The system is at play against us and we must understand that. Unfortunately, negativity draws more attention in this world. If I wrote an article confessing my love for my Queens it will undoubtedly receive less attention than if I wrote an article entitled “What’s Wrong with Black Women, A Black Man’s Perspective.” For some of you your mind is already salivating to read that.
The overwhelming majority of black men date black women exclusively, yet because of the 30% representation that is not perceived as the truth. The majority of black men support their children and do not abuse their spouse, yet that is not the perception. The overwhelming majority of black men have never called a black women out her name in any malicious way, yet the 30% representation unfortunately has that in doubt in some people’s mind. This false narrative is extremely dangerous and has led to the figurative castration of the black man in our society. Let me further explain.
There was a statistical claim asserted in the Article by Dr. Kristian H that black men abuse their significant others at higher rates than white men. Further analysis of the data must be presented. The CDC study that the doctor quotes does not factor in yearly income. When we do, we see that levels of domestic violence among white and black men are more closely matched. As a matter of fact we see less levels of domestic violence among black men that make over 60,000 dollars a year than their white counterparts. Studies show that domestic violence drastically drops when you look at data of all men who make over a certain amount per year. That shows that the higher rates of domestic violence amongst black men is directly related to socioeconomic status. Why are there more poor black men on average compared to white men? I pray you said white supremacy before you read it. So to present that data without analyzing it within the context of white supremacy paints a picture of black men that we are inherently more dangerous than our white counterparts. So instead of battling and understanding domestic violence within the framework of economics, job training, etc., we then take the conservative route and say that abusers need to stop abusing on their own and if they don’t lock them up and throw away the key. That will always lead to disproportionate rates of black male incarceration due to the failure to address white supremacy’s socioeconomic impact. This line of thinking is extremely dangerous and articles like this have and will be used by those that have explicit intent to further destroy the black community. Please remember the chain analogy.
Black women please continue to join the 70% of black men of righteous intent in our ongoing attempts to disassemble toxic masculinity. Do not support the notion that we created and therefore own this mental disease, rather the notion that this is a system placed upon us in which you play an active role in perpetuating. If you don’t believe me, examine this scenario. Your black male significant other (you have been dating for 1 month) comes to you in tears. He expresses to you his hurt feelings over his female employer’s verbal abuse towards him. How many of you would look at him in a more positive light. Regardless of what your answer may be, the overwhelming majority of black men would assume you would see him in a less positive light. Now remember if you argue that, you can be accused of being white and not listening to black men’s concerns. That was a cheap shot designed to show how ingrained toxic masculinity is in all our psyche and society. I believe in accountability, but we must also prioritize and focus our energies. I don’t mind if people in salons and barber shops have frank discussions about gender, race, and everything else. Undoubtedly people are going to generalize and say things like “black men this…” and “black women that…” However when someone writes an academic article under the guise of analytical intelligence then we all should expect, rather demand, a comprehensive full view of our problems be laid out. The alternative is extremely hurtful and dangerous.